How y’all doin’ this fine morn?
If you have driven through Kentucky on 1-75, you know about the “FLORENCE Y’ALL” WATER TOWER- 500 Mall Circle Rd., Florence, KY.
It seems that back in the 70s, the mall was yet to be built, but the land was already owned by the developers. The city wanted part of the area for a water tower, and the developers gave them the section on the condition that it advertised the upcoming Florence Mall right next to it. The water tower was built, “Florence Mall” was painted on it, and then the legal issues came up. It turns out the Bureau of Highways has height limits on roadside advertising, and this definitely was much taller than the legal limit. Instead of spending the money to repaint the whole thing, they changed “mall” to the colloquialism “y’all.”
I can imagine this conversation.
PERSON 1: Well, we have to change it. After all of that work of looking up all the spelling in the dictionary and getting the painters to paint it on the side of the tower… what do we do now?!
PERSON 2: We could blast the “mall” part with white? Then paint a pretty design on it.
PERSON 1: Nah, too much time and money.
PERSON 2: We could…. alter the word? Maybe… “Florence, man!”
PERSON 1: … no, then motorists will think we are saying all the men in Florence look like the water tower. Then weird rock songs will be written-
PERSON 2: No, there’s a comma between “Florence” and “man,” so… people will get it, trust me! It’ll make us sound hip!
PERSON 1: A comma?! Change two whole letters?! Nope, we only have money to change one letter, how can we do this?
PERSON 2: Florence… Moll… Florence… Tall… it’s a tall tower?!
LUNCH BOY: Wut y’all want f’lunch today?
PERSON 1 & 2: Y’ALL!
If nothing else, it has made for a good laugh, which is need because I-75 around the Kentucky/Ohio border is often riddled with cops and they love to stick it to out-of-state motorists.
… yes, I have found out the hard way in the past. Twice.
A bonus attraction is if you pull over into the Harley Davidson parking lot nearby to look at the tower, you can see this cool horse made out of motorcycle accessories.
Until next time, dahlings…