Mon cher mesdames et monsieurs,

Fun fact about me: my luggage is cursed.

This is why I never check airline luggage, if I can help it, due to the fact that it quite frequently takes its own vacation separate from me and joins me at a later date than intended.

The most notorious story I have regarding this is from several years ago when my parents, my sister, and I were flying out to visit my other sister. I was shoving everything into a carry on bag and my father was giving me a hard time. “My luggage always goes somewhere else,” I told him. “We’re all checking bags, yours will be with ours, it will be fine,” he assured me. A child likes to trust their elders, their protectors, because surely they are more knowledgeable. At least, this is what they pound into our heads all of our childhoods. I decided to trust him, and checked my luggage.

The next day, our plane landed, and everyone’s luggage had arrived… except mine. Mine had gone to Denver. I’ve never been to Denver, but many things that I own have. It finally arrived at our hotel around 1am. Ever since then, whenever I am going on a trip, my father says, “You’re carrying your luggage on, right?”

I am lucky in the fact that I have never permanently lost my luggage; it’s always just taken a detour. There are some unfortunate souls that never see their luggage again, or for some reason they never pick up their luggage from baggage claim.

What happens to this luggage? Somehow, much of it winds up at the UNCLAIMED BAGGAGE CENTER- 509 W Willow St, Scottsboro, AL.

The Unclaimed Baggage Center is like a very large, very internationally diverse Goodwill or Salvation Army.

Clothing, jewelry, electronics, sporting equipment, art, firearms, and so much more are for sale at this facility. It is, as you can see, huge.

The selection within every category is also vastly diverse. From the elegant to the… questionable.

They have a quasi-museum as well of some truly unusual, notorious, or valuable items that have been found. A needlepoint project that turned out to be Bing Crosby’s wife’s (they have the thank you letter she wrote after it was returned to her), vintage trumpets, tribal armor, a unicycle, and more…

The absolute craziest item they have that made this kid’s, and will make any 80s kids’, jaw drop…

Hoggle, the dwarf from Labyrinth! THE Hoggle! The actual puppet that took five people to operate in the film! How do you LOSE or forget Hoggle?!? He was apparently quite deteriorated when the UBC found him and a doll hospital was commissioned to restore him. Shoppers avoided me when I, a lone girl, started sputtering in disbelief at the glass.

… he’s not for sale, by the way, I checked.

If you are near Scottsboro, you have to check out the Unclaimed Baggage Center. New items come in every day and they have an extensive selection. When you need a break from your hunting, they have a small cafe in the store.

Go, sputter at Hoggle for a minute, and shop for that bargain. My advice: stay away from the underwear. I’m sure they clean it, but there’s still something weird about that.

Until next time, dahlings…